A few days have past since I last posted, so I guess you can say we are that much closer to bringing home Alexsey. However, I am ashamed to admit that I have been less than joyful (secretly of course) watching so many other families get their dossier submitted just because the child that they are hoping to adopt has special needs that are different than Alexsey's special needs. I know, I know, shame on me--- and yes even in the midst of my envy I am also praising the Lord that those children are coming home--- but at the same time, I am pleading with Him to let Alexsey join these children and come home too. It is just not fair.
And I know that life isn't fair-- and that more than once I have seen the amazing plan that seemed to make no sense to me at the time---- that God had all along-- but it doesn't make the current situation any easier.
Everything our family is doing right now, I think how Alesxey is missing out on it. We went to the river, and I could envision Alexsey pointing to it with excitement in his eyes. But he missed it. Dennis and I had a bowl of Borscht today---- and Alexsey missed that too. Sure, he probably gets plenty of borscht in the orphanage but it is not the same as my borscht--- made with love and eaten with his Mama. It is just not the same.
Our wonderful school has went ahead and placed Alexsey on a waiting list for pre-school assuming that he will be here by the end of summer. Will he be here God? Is that Your plan? Please let it be Your plan.
Lord, I know in my heart that Alexsey is ultimately Yours and that Your plan for Him is greater than I'll ever know this side of heaven. I will hold onto this truth not only for just Alexsey, but for all my children. I remember writing this post just a year ago when we were in the process of adopting Dennis. Reading it was just what I needed today.
2 years ago