Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Thank you so Much

I can't even begin to express my gratitude to all of you who emailed me privately about my last post. Not only has it been humbling to admit that I was sort of silently flipping out after (really)researching Spina Bifida-- I mean up until now I just always saw Alexsey for Alexsey-- and not any of his potential health problems, but it has also been hard to admit that despite my faith in our almighty God, I still fear, I still doubt, I still want to cling to the comfort of this world, I still want to back up when it feels like I am about to step out of the boat. Thank you for helping me to realize that not dwelling on Alexsey's Spina Bifida is exactly the right thing to do.

I know that in my heart.

I still remember his innocent and flirtatious smile-- that curious side of him that wants to explore the world around him but has never been given the chance. It is the little boy behind that smile that I want to focus on-- not anything else.

Alexsey is perfect in God's eyes, and I need to push out of my mind all the "what ifs" and "but hows."

Lord, I thank you for providing me the reassurance and encouragement that I needed today.

Be with Alexsey, and all of my children-- always.

6 comments:

Alice said...

Be encouraged. The Lord will bless your faithfulness. My oldest sister was born with Spina Bifida. She is now in her 50's. She has led a wonderful, full life. She has done almost everything she ever wanted to do. Her life has had more challenges, and more pain than most, but she doesn't see herself as different in any way. Five years ago, her first grandson was born with a mild form of SB. It was not discovered until he had severe meningitis. He recovered fully and his spine was successfully closed. In August, he will walk into Kindergarten with his classmates.
Blessings on your journey. I'm so excited that Alexsey is coming home soon!

Courtney said...

I know you already know this, but Satan is a genius at targeting the areas that will affect us the most, especially right before we travel for an adoption! As soon as you see Alosha again you will remember why he is meant to be part of your family. :)

Lauren in TX said...

So excited for you and your growing family! Congratulations. I have followed your story since before Dennis came home. So awesome that he gets to bring Alexi back to what he now knows as HOME! I can't imagine your excitement - you get to go see him in 4 days!!!

sylsumida said...

Love and prayers to you and your beautiful family. What an encouragement you are to so many people.

Anonymous said...

This might help.....I was talking to a nurses' aide where I work yesterday and she told me she has spina bifida. She spends all day every day lifting people, bending, etc. and even as a professional I'd never have guessed she had the diagnosis.

Rachel said...

My own mother has Spina Bifida, and she birthed 4 children and raised 5. (one was adopted at birth) She was and is a wonderful mom and friend.